The Ember and Crystal Blog
by Antonia Stark-Bondevik
Summary: Hello, and welcome to the blog of two average Nordic Capitols, Reykjavik and Oslo. They've hacked this account to post (at the request of their brothers, Norway and Iceland.) Avoid the bird bombs, and don't touch Oslo's headband if you want to live! COMMENTS BY PM.
1. Chapter 1

_Oslo is italics_

Reykjavik is normal

(Parentheses is me, the Admin!)

**Welcome to Oslo and Reykjavik's Blog**

**Blog Post Number: One**

**You are visitor number: One **

**Location: Oslo's Room**

**Subject: Our So-Called Punishment**

Well. Hello, blogosphere. I really don't want to be here, but here I am. My brother recommended that we make a blog together, after our last fight. So here I am. T_T

_Rey. Stop being such a downer. I'm being forced into this too._

Right...I suppose we have to introduce ourselves, seeing as we've hijacked this account from its admin-

(It was a favor for Norway and Iceland!)

-and we have hacked it. The admin lies. I suppose I should tell you about me, or something.

**Name: Reykjavik (Hanna Steilsson)**

**Age: ...fifteen in human years. **

**Height: About five feet, seeing as most of you readers are American.**

Did I get the conversion right, Oslo?

_Yes._

**Weight: ...what do you care? **

**Favorite color: ...black. Like my soul.**

_She's being an idiot. Her favorite color is light blue. _

Thanks a lot, Oslo.

_No problem._

I was being sarcastic.

**Pets: Logi, the idiotic Skua who refuses to leave me alone.**

(Logi's kind of adorable~)

No she isn't. Silence, admin, we're hacking your account.

**Family: Norway (Brother), Oslo (Sister), Iceland (Brother)**

Why did Oslo name this the cousin's blog? I'm her sister, and I will NOT call her cousin.

_Cousin, Reykjavik~ Cousinnn~_

Shut up, Oslo.

**Prized Possession: My headphones. Useful for tuning out the world. **

_Hei. My turn now, Rey. _

**Name: Oslo (Sylvi Bondevik) **

**Age: Sixteen in human years**

**Height: Five foot five, for the Americans. The (American) admin insisted that we do it in feet, because she hates conversions. **

**Weight: ...that's personal, takk. **

**Family: Norway (brother), Iceland (brother), Reykjavik (sister) **

**Pets: ...does my spirit wolf count? Because I say it does. **

**Prized Possession: My headband. You'll almost never see me without it. It has the Norwegian flag on it.**

...Oslo...that "guardian whatever" is not a pet.

_Why not? Norway counts his troll as a pet. _

...your logic defies me, Bondevik.

_That is my purpose in life...cousin. _

No. Not calling you cousin.

_Ah, you will. Someday. We haven't explained why we're even here, have we? After our last argument got a little...out of hand-_

It was entirely Copenhagen's fault.

_Yes, it was. That idiot stole my headband, then I was extra pissed. _

Copenhagen is an idiot.

_One thing we can agree on._

Yes. But anyway. Iceland and Norway have decided that we need to "bond" or something. So here we are. Hacking this random user's account.

(...I know you...IRL, guys...)

No you don't. Send us comments or whatever, because that is the only way to appease the brothers.

_And tell Reykjavik to call me cousin._

No. Tell Oslo to stop that.

(Guys, wrap up this post, I need my account back.)

Whatever...this is getting boring, anyway.

_Get typing. Yes, you, reading this. I can see you._

Oslo, stop scaring people.

(...you guys forgot the most important part, the bit that is going to keep me out of trouble.)

...what?

_...hva?_

(Send comments by PM, duh!)

Oh...right...appease our admin.

(My apologies to Anons, but...I like my account, takk.)

_...whatever the admin says, in regards to that. It is her account, even if we hacked it. _

Ugh, you're right, Oslo.

(Well thanks. COMMENTS BY PM, people!)

Do we even need to introduce you?

(No. I will introduce myself, whether you like it or not. I am Antonia Stark! And they wouldn't have been allowed on my account unless I WANTED it. They lie. Und you can call me Toni. Or Igi. I'm ok either way.)

That was unwarranted, admin.

(Stop calling me "admin" and call me "Toni," Reykjavik.)

Nah. Don't feel like it.

(Log off my account and leave me alone, guys. )

...fine.

Logging off,

_Oslo (Sylvi Bondevik) _and Reykjavik (Hanna Steilsson)

(Admin's Note: If you get what I did with the title, free internet cookie. :D)


	2. Copenhagen is an Idiot

**Welcome to Oslo and Reykjavik's Blog**

**You Are Visitor Number: Reykjavik is too lazy to check or care**

**Blog Post Number: Two**

**Location: Oslo's place**

******Mood:** Annoyed as all get-out

**Listening to: Reykjavik complaining about her pet bird (who has just crapped on her [again]).**

**Reading: These comments.**

**Watching: Admin is watching PewDiePie videos on her screen. I can hear it. T_T**

**Eating: Fish and potatoes. Nothing is better. **

**Drinking: Nothing.**

**Subject: That Idiot and Her Ginger beer**

_Hello, people I don't know or care about. Since we're at Oslo's place this time, she's doing the typing. _

How observant of you, Rey.

_Shut up._

Rey's just pissy because Denmark's capitol (I refuse to call her by name at the moment) spilled Ginger beer all over the following items:

A.) Her headphones and MP3

B.) Me, my headband included

C.)The bird, which we did have to wash

Don't even ask me how she accomplished all of that, because I don't know.

_My headphones...are broken. I will not have this. _

Calm down, Rey, we have comments to answer before we go kill Copenhagen. But it'll mainly be me.

_You get too physical. _

I do not.

_You punched her 37 times the other day. _

…

**Comments: **

**Weirdo0101:**

**Reykjavik call Oslo cousin plz! And how do you two view NorIce?  
**

**Svar (Response):**

_No. I simply will not. She is definitely insane in some form, I don't want her to be of any relation to me._

I'm hurt, little cousin. I'm not insane.

_Yes, you are. _

_...NorIce? What's that? Admin?_

(E-Eh? Kyaah! It's when people...think that your brothers are...ne...)

_When they- *realization* Oh jeez...no. Just...no. _

Eew. No. The day that happens is the day I start dating Rey.

_Eew. I'm not going to date you._

That's the point.

_Oh. _

**BlueberryTeaLove:**

**Hehehe this blog looks awesome~ =w=**

Anyway, what's with "cousin?" I apologise for sounding rude but you have me curious. :3  
...Pfft, I am not sure which side I should pick in that argument. Getting Reykjavik to say "cousin" is tempting. =w=

It honestly is tempting.

**And yes, I am named after a colour. :) **

**Svar****:**

(I KNOW YOUUU! OMG HAI!)

Um...hello, friend of the Admin. Oh, and Takk. We do our best.

_Actually...I..eh..._

Reykjavik won't tell the story, so I will. When we were littler, (more like when she was littler) she thought that we were their biological daughters. It's a common misconception, actually. So, then I would have been her cousin. And, her being young and adorable, she actually took to it. Then we figured out the whole sister thing...and ja, I miss when she was adorable and called me cousin.

_Embarrass me on the internet, why don't you, Oslo?_

Anytime, Cousin dear.

_Don't call me that! Please don't side with Oslo... T_T_

Join me.

(LOLOFCOURSEYOUARE! :D)

_Don't listen to her. The Admin confuses even me. _

(Stop calling me "the Admin," Reykjavik! T_T)

_How about no. _

**Anonymous Quincy (Romania and Bucharest):**

**Romania: Kekekekekeke, hey guys~! Glad to see Nor and Ice are keeping you two out of trouble. I've got my own little trouble maker to deal with too so I figured I'd give him something to do to keep him entertained while I answer letters.**

Bucharest: Nuuuu~! I don't want too~!

Romania: Too bad. Talk to the lovely ladies Alexandru.

Bucharest: *Frustrated pout* You're a mean brother dumping me off here!

Romania: And you are a thorn in my side that I needed to deal with. Now say hi and play nice. *leaves*

Bucharest: ... I don't even know what I'm supposed to do with these crazy blog things. Um, I guess I'll start with a greeting. Salut, I'm Alexandru and I'm the Romanian capitol of Bucharest. Hi, Oslo! *childish grin* Oh, Oslo, London wanted to let us know that he's free this weekend to hang out if you're still interested. I also weaseled his human name out of him. It's Blake. Funny right? Well anyway, I guess I'll be responding alot to this since Stefan is pretty busy and needs to keep me out of his hair for a while, so I'll see you later. BTW typing this on my shiny new laptop big brother Romania bought for me. He says he did it because he needs the main computer to answer letters. Bye bye~! 

**Svar:**

*blushes* Hi, A-Bucharest...

_Finally, I have some blackmail against Oslo. _

Yes, I'm interested. *Blushes* Whose house?

_Oslo's going on a date~ with her boyfriend~_

S-Stop it, Rey!

_No. _

Seriously, Reykjavik! Stop it! *Blushing profusely*

_Oslo and Bucharest, sitting in a tree-_

*shoving Reykjavik's head into the wall* Unnskyld about her, Bucharest. And I will need confirmation on that later...*smirks*

_*grunts* Oslo, let me go NOW before Noregur sees._

No. You can't do that, Rey, even over the internet. It's not cool.

_All right, all right, I'm sorry!_

Call me cousin as proof of your apologies.

_Never._

Then your head will be shoved into the wall until I finish responding to Bucharest.

_Noregur is going to kill you when he sees this._

I have justifications this time. *coughs* Anyway. We have to share the admin's laptop, which is kind of crappy. It crashes every time we try to save a document in OpenOffice. T_T Oh well, she tries. You're lucky, you've got a new one. *blushes*

_OSLO HAS A CRUSH ON YOUU~_

*puts hand over a struggling Reykjavik's mouth* Ehe...don't listen to her...she lies...

allrightbyeBucharest!


	3. Save Us From The Idiot

**Welcome to Oslo and Reykjavik's Blog**

**You are Visitor number: Up yours**

**Blog Post Number: Three**

**Location: Sandvika (Not too far from my place)**

******Mood:** Bored

**Listening to:  
**

**Reading: These comments.**

**Watching: Reykjavik is attempting to smother her bird...that's fairly entertaining.**

**Eating: Fish and potatoes. (I used to survive off of fish, potatoes, rocks, and plundering. I gave up rocks and plundering, but I still love fish and potatoes.) **

**Drinking: Nothing.**

**Subject: Copenhagen (Johanne) is here to Muck up our blog post**

Hei. Oslo here. And I'm in charge again.

_But probably not for long, since Copenhagen is visiting. We've been locked in a house with Copenhagen and supplies. I think they want to see how long it is before we murder her. Well, more like Oslo murders her. _

I murder her? I wouldn't.

(Not to quote Llamas in Hats, but you punched her 37 times in the chest. Don't lie, Oslo.)

I wouldn't!

_Yes, you would._

What's this?

T_T Oh look, it's the idiot of the moment.

;A; Oslo, stop being cruel!

How about no?

_Hey guys, I got a text from Ísland. He says that Stockholm and Helsinki were supposed to be here but they took Hanatamago hostage._

_...he also says that they're going to catch them eventually and they have to suffer with us._

...they would. They're like the dynamic duo or something. And good, I will not die in a house with the idiot.

(BATMAN REFERENCE FTW! :D)

_Anyway. Comments before Copenhagen and Oslo kill each other. _

(Why are they rivals, anyway?)

_Well, I have no idea. They just are, and always have been._

**Comments:**

**London:**

**Hello,  
Uh, I honestly am not sure what to say, but I'll start with a introduction. I'm London, Britain's capitol. Call me Blake if you want, it's my human name. *smiles* I hope we can get to know each other. I will be replying quite often since the gi- my brother, decided that he was going to visit Japan and I honestly have no intention of talking to Glasgow anytime soon. But anyway, pleased to meet you,  
London~ **

**Svar****:**

Hei, London! I do know your genderbend. The admin keeps her around for nerd favors.

(I ask for tickets to Top Gear live and suddenly all I'm friends with her for is "Nerd favors"?)

Yes.

(Not fair! Victoria is nice! D:)

Whatever. Pleased to meet you, too, London.

_Ja, nice to meet you._

Hej~

Your input is not necessary, idiot.

;A;

**Bucharest****: **

**Bucharest: Hm? I wasn't listening to Rey, what'd she say? Sorry if I'm a bit distracted, but I went to get some juice while Romania was answering letters and I found the receipt for my laptop and I feel bad. Big brother doesn't have much money and he spent an arm and a leg on this just 'cause I was being a brat. Now I want to make it up to him, but I don't know how. But I'm getting off topic. We can come to big brother's house since I don't want England to food-poison me if that's ok. If not would your house be acceptable? Sorry about being so spacey, I just need to think about things is all. Any suggestions how I could make it up to Romania? I don't have any ideas. **

**Svar****: **

Hm...I don't know, Alexandru, I'm sorry. Ask the admin, she knows about computers.

(Ne? Well...my brother does make computers and stuff. I also give rubbish advice, though, OSLO.)

You're the best we've got at the moment, unless Reykjavik has a suggestion.

What about me?

Your opinion doesn't matter.

;A;

(E-Eh...I don't know, I'm sorry! ;A;)

Pipe down, admin.

(Meanie. ;^;)

Rey?

_Well...I dunno, either. Just be good, I guess...that's what I do when Iceland yells at me. _

Dude, Icey yells? At you?

_What? _

DUUUDE!

Shut up, Copenhagen!

You're just pissy because you like Bucharest and-MMPH!

*choking Copenhagen with a blanket* All of you should just shut the hell up.

Mmph-Bye!

You have no say in my blog, moron.

;A;

**BlueberryTeaLove****: **

**Mugyuu...It's hard to pick sides.**

Lololol heylo~ :3

Pfft. Oslo and...

...karma.

._.

Nevermind.

So...hm. You guys uh, oh I know! What's your favourite movie? 

**Svar****:**

Join me.

_Protect me, please. Oslo is psychotic._

No I'm not.

_You strangled Copenhagen with a blanket, tied her up with duct tape, and left her in the closet. _

She spilled ginger beer on my headband, remember? And your headphones.

_...Your actions are justified._

(O_O Well, you both scare me sometimes. UND HAI!)

T_T What was that?

(She's not in a good mood right now.)

_No, really, admin! I HAD NO IDEA! _

(Oh, stuff it, Reykjavik.)

Both of you shut up.

(...)

_O_O..._

There.

*From closet* BIG BROTHER! D: HELP US! D: 

She has nothing to add. Anyway. I like Lord of The Rings and Harry Potter.

_Hmm...The Dark Knight. _

(Avengers, all the way! :D)

I liked Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark, if anyone cares! D:

No. We do not care. Do you want me to duct tape your mouth, too?

Nej...

Then shut up.

**Moscow:**

**привет Oslo and Reykjavik! Ummm, well, I guess, hi. *cough* I don't really know what to say. I'm kind of new to the whole 'socializing' thing. Brother Russia is sort of making me write this. He wants me to make some friends so that they will, and I quote, "become one with us faster". He does have a good point. I guess I should introduce myself, da? My name is Moscow, but you can call me Calina. I'm fifteen in human years but I lost could of my real age. I'm about 183 cm, that's about 6' 1". I don't really smile that much either. I usually only smile when I want to freak people out. It's pretty funny~  
I haven't seen you guys at meetings much. Do you go to all of them? I have to come to all of them because Brother never pays attention or takes notes. I swear, the only reason he comes at all is because our boss makes him and to ask everyone to become one with us. I'm not complaining though, I like going to meetings. They are very interesting and loud. The only down side is that I have to see Washington DC. He's a Американский чертовски мудак. I would very much like to kill him with my bare hands. After the next meeting, would you like to go drinking with me? There's no drinking age at my place, so we will be fine, da! **

**Svar:**

O_O

_O_O_

O_O

You have no say in our blog, Copenhagen.

;A;

Anyway. Uh, hei, Moscow.

_I agree, freaking people out is fun. But I freak people out by not paying attention to them._

Actually, we don't. We're very isolated people, very...internal affairs-oriented? Other countries prefer to have major foreign relations- like, say, England- but we're not really into that. And, storebror Norge isn't part of the EU, so less meetings for me.

_And me._

D.C? I don't think I've met him. I can't say.

(I've met America, though...he was a total-)

_Don't rant, admin, it's not your blog. It's ours. _

(Fine.)

Um...storebror Norge says that I have to be back in by midnight. He's a bit protective, but I don't mind. Ever since... *shakes head and coughs* never mind. But he is.

_I can't drink. Too sick for it, it doesn't help in any way. Just makes things worse. A__fsökunarbeiðni. Uh, Apologies. _

I'm up for it! :D

Don't listen to her. Although, if you're willing to take her off our hands...

**Reykjavik Steilsson:**

***signs* Hi, I'm another version of Reykjavik, but instead of a girl I'm a guy. I'm also mute, not deaf, mute. Nice to meet you guys. How are you two today? **

**Svar:**

_Um...hi...male...me..._

(I think she's in shock. :3)

No, really?

(You're so mean...)

_Silence, peasant._

(D:)

_Uh, fine, I guess. But Copenhagen is here..._

Nothing is fine with her around.

D: Why do you guys hate mee?

It eludes me currently.

**Weirdo0101:**

**Oslo, you and Bucharest are dating? So cute~ So Reyjavik, who do you like, hmm?  
I`ll guess if i have to. Oh, so how you guys doin'? OsRey,is that what you would  
call it? **

**Svar:**

o/o I'm not dating Bucharest, I don't have a crush on Bucharest! O/O

_You are a horrible liar, Oslo._

S-Shut up!

_Nobody. I like nobody. _

I'm going to figure you out someday, Rey...

_I do not. Have. A crush. On. Anyone. Endofstory._

(Actually, I believe Rey. Looking at the internets right now, Ice-san doesn't have very close international relations with anybody except your family- that being the other Nordics...and you're kind of family.)

Hm, that makes sense.

_Wow...uh, thank you, admin._

(Stop calling me admin!)

We. Are. Related. And. Not. Dating. Endofsubject.

_Besides the fact that Oslo has a crush on Bucha-mmph!_

*shoving Reykjavik's head into the couch cushions* Rey, silence.

Hahah! What's this? Does Oslo have a cruuush~?

N-No! Go away, idiot!

She DOES! Rey, I would have never believed it!

_*muffled*** **Me too..._

All of you, shut up! O/O

Hej, aren't Helsinki and Stockholm getting here soon, too? They'll be impressed.

Shut up! You will tell Aino and Kai over my dead body!

So you DO have a crush on Bucharest!

NO!

_*muffled* Yes, you do._

o/o Johanne! Hanna! Stop it!

Sylvi...I thought I would never see the day when you-Ah!

*pulling Copenhagen's scarf* Shut up. Just shut your mouth.

_Never._

(You're going to lose, Oslo, especially if they get Helsinki in on this.)

That's why I'm trying to stop them!

(That's never going to happen.)

Thanks for the support. *sarcasm*

(Anytime~)

All right, that's all for today. Hopefully I won't be forced to inflict more permanent damage on Copenhagen.

Farvel.

_Bless!_

_Reykjavik (Hanna) _Oslo (Sylvi) and Copenhagen (Johanne)


End file.
